Funny Retirement Quotes

Funny Retirement Quotes is where you'll find sayings and phrases, that are both amusing and about retiring from a lifetime of laboring for a living, which are suitable for using in a speech or a card. Free for non commercial use.











I'm retired — I'm not dead!

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Retirement must be wonderful. I mean, you can suck in your stomach for only so long.
Burt Reynolds

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When some people retire, it's going to be mighty hard to tell the difference.

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The key to a happy retirement is to have enough money to live on, but not enough to worry about.

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You're retired — goodbye tension, hello pension!

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Enjoy every retirement day as if it was your last and one day you will be right about it.

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You can do things you never could before e.g

I felt like my body hag gotten totally out of shape,
so I got my doctor's permission to join a fitness club
and start exercising.

I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors.
I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and
perspired for an hour.

But,by the time I got my leotards on,the class was over.

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Always Remember This:
You don't stop laughing because you grow old,
You grow old because you stop laughing

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The golf club days now melt into one
I don't know how I found the time;
To go to work and do odd jobs
Even when the sun does shine.

Time hasn't stopped or even slowed
I though that I'd have time on my hands;
It's going even faster now
The timer full of that sand.

My friends are what keep me sane
And it's good to keep in touch;
As friends and family are
The ones I love so much.
Maggie-May

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When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
George Burns

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Go to Retirement Wishes from Funny retirement Quotes